Three-day Diary

I still miss you till today.

This song is for you, Nikos.

Happy 24th birthday, sweet god! :)

It has been 6 years. I saw this from my diary when that fateful moment happened. :(

THREE-DAY DIARY

March 8, 2006

11:00 AM

Wednesday

It has been a week since I last sent him an SMS. I think it's enough time that I gave him to think over about forgiving me.

I sent him a message earlier this morning. But he didn't reply. Pride took over me so I didn't text him again.

(sigh)

I miss him. I hate long distance relationships. Why does he have to study in San Beda? There are lots of good schools here in Cebu! :(

He's probably partying now..with prettier girls. Damn, I'm insecure again!

Never mind!

I hate him.

I hate him now.

I shouldn't have asked sorry in the first place.

March 9, 2006

Thursday

I can't take it anymore. I really miss that half-bred guy! He's my sweet god and i'm his sweetie goddess. So, I texted him how much I'm longing to be with him again.

I was so happy seeing a reply from him but got sad again reading it.

>>I'm sorry, Missy. I don't want to talk to you yet. You go along and find someone new. You deserve someone better. Just remember,  you'll always be someone special to me.<<

It hurts a lot but I still responded:

^^How could I find someone better when for me you're already the best?....Can't we work this out? Please? I'm really sorry about what I have said..I'm sorry..^^

He didn't reply.

I sent him messages of regret and asking forgiveness over and over again. Still no reply.

(sigh)

I cried myself to sleep today.

March 10, 2006

Friday

Morning

I woke up at 5:32 AM 'coz my phone rang. His name appeared on my phone's screen. He's calling me!

"Hi! You called!",I started excitedly despite my groggy voice.

"Hello...Is this Missy?", an unfamiliar voice echoed from the other line.

"Mmm..yeah..Who's this, please?"I replied, disappointed. He's calling me Missy so he probably listens to the FM Radio I'm working at.

"This is Arcus. Nikos' friend.."

"Oh..hi! Why d'you call? Where's he?" I said, now upset.

"Missy, somethin' happened..."

I suddenly got nervous. My palm sweated and I felt cold all over.

"Come over to Nikos' house here at Beverly Hills, okay? Just take a cab.", he said it gently, requesting, not commanding.

Before I could formulate questions, he already said goodbye.

Beverly hills? He's in Cebu and I don't know?

(hurt)

March 10, 2006

Friday

9:00 PM

Just got home (boarding house)  from Nikos'. I don't feel like talking. He's doubling the pain he's giving me lately. Everything really hurts like hell! This life sucks!!!

March 10, 2006

Friday

11:31 PM

I can't sleep. It's nearly 12 midnight. I'm supposed to greet him coz it's going to be his 18th birthday in less than half an hour. But I can't... (sad)

Who am I gonna greet?

Nikos is gone.

He left me earlier today...

March 10,2006

Friday

11:36 PM

My phone rang. My mom called.

"What happened?", she sound worried.

"Ma..." I wept bitterly. My mom knows what's going on between me and Nikos lately. According to her, it's just a test. That things like cool-off  and breaking up do happen in relationships at times. 

i wish she could hug me now. I really need her.

"Tell me...", she said, soothingly.

"Ma,Nikos left me already..."

"That's okay. Maybe he's really not for you. Maybe you can still find other guys to love. Or maybe in the end, in the future, you'll be together again. Both of you are still young, sweetie..Everything will be fine.."

"Ma..you don't understand..Ma, Nikos is gone..He's dead..."

March 11, 2006

Saturday

12:00 Midnight

And again, I cried myself to sleep today.

Happy birthday, Nikos...

-Camaeja-

DJ Missy was my deejay name. 

Below is Nikos' Facebook. This is a tribute for him since it's his birthday today. I hope he's happy wherever he is now. I will always remember him.